Wouldn’t it be great to never get stuck with a problem? I know I’ve experienced so many times in my life when it felt like there was a huge, immovable problem in my way, and I had no idea how to get around it -- and I just felt more and more powerless.
For many years I wanted desperately to be thin, and felt like I couldn’t be happy until I was. The thing that kept me stuck was the belief that dieting would make me thin, and being thin would make me happy.
I felt like I was on a hamster wheel, going around and around and trying the same things over and over again, but always ending up in the same place. It was perfectly miserable.
Everything in my life led me to believe that dieting was the answer, and I was a failure because it didn’t work for me. If only I could do it better or longer or more strictly…
I only questioned my own competence and strength; never the “system” of dieting = weight-loss = happiness.
Only when I started to gently challenge those beliefs did I experience any relief. Through my treatment for binge-eating disorder, I began to slowly see the reality: dieting actually hardly ever works, and being thin was not the answer to my problems. It took me quite a while to realize those things, but once I did, it was pure liberation.
One thing that really helped me was just questioning the assumptions I was making.
I need to be smaller to be happy. Do I?
Dieting will make me smaller. Will it?
If I don’t diet, I will spiral out of control. Really?
The answers may not come quickly, and they may not be clear yet, but asking them shows that you’re ready to do things differently.
When I think back to that day when I called to make an appointment to finally get some help with this lifelong struggle, I can’t really think of any single thought that inspired me other than, “I’ve got to try something different.” I didn’t know what the answers were, but I knew I needed help to find them.
If you’re stuck, it may be time to do things differently.
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